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One Sentence Summary: The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People teaches you both personal and professional effectiveness by changing your view of how the world works and giving you 7 habits, which, if adopted well, will lead you to immense success. This book has sold over 25 million copies. If Stephen R. Covey had any clue about what a success The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People would be when he published it in 1990, but, even several years after his death, it’s still the bible of leadership and modern management. The original seven habits are: 1. Be Proactive 2. Begin with the End in Mind 3. Put First Things First 4. Think Win-Win 5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood 6. Synergize 7. Sharpen the Saw The first three serve your own independence, so that you may “win in private,” as Covey put it. The second three aim to shift your focus to interdependence. When you strive for cooperation instead of competition, you’ll also “win in public” and find worldly success. The last habit serves your own renewal so that you’ll never burn out or overextend yourself. Let’s look at the following 3 in more detail: 1. Do the funeral test. 2. Learn how to say no. 3. Practice active listening. Time to learn how to become highly effective both at work and in life! Lesson 1: Do the funeral test. This is the habit that Covey calls “Begin with the End in Mind”. He issues a warning that plowing away and getting a massive amount of tasks done in a preferably short time (i.e. being efficient) is only useful when you’re plowing in the right direction. The classic analogy here is the ladder you’re climbing furiously, only to find out it’s leaned against the wrong wall when reaching the top. Only if you’re clear about your major, long- term goals can you align each and every single one of your decisions with them. The best way, by far, to get clear about those goals is to do the funeral test. Ask yourself: 1. What do I want people to say about me at my funeral? 2. As what sort of person do I want to be remembered? 3. For what do I want to be remembered? Depending on your number of relationships (family, friends, clients, partners, customers), you can also ask yourself how many people will be there to mourn your death. As Steve Jobs said: “All external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure–these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.” Truthfully answering those questions will make you realize you might not want that out-of- the-suitcase, business class lifestyle, or that really all you ever wanted to do was dance . So be bold and ask them. Lesson 2: Learn how to say no. Knowing exactly where you want to go makes it easy to find out what’s important to you, and what not. When you know your final goal, you’ll at least have an inclination for each to-do on how important it actually is. You’ll often find that the important things aren’t urgent and vice versa . That means some things don’t deserve to be done at all. To all those things, you’ll eventually have to say no. It’s not easy, especially if money’s involved. But, as Covey says: “Put First Things First.” Sometimes, tempting rewards will be dangled right in front of you, which is when it’s time to pull out the funeral test again to see whether those rewards deserve to be chased. Derek Sivers in this regard, who says it’s either a hell yeah, or a no . He’s incredibly focused on a few things , but those things create all the meaning he needs in his life. Lesson 3: Practice active listening. The good thing about saying no to doing a lot of things is being able to spend a lot more time actually listening to others. 1. You’re listening to understand the person you’re listening to, not primarily to give advice or respond. 2. You make sure you understand by repeating back to them what they said and mirroring their emotions. 3. You help them structure their own thought process. This was one of the Covey calls this “Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood.” It is a call to practice active listening and empathy. Just like you get suspicious of your doctor when he prescribes you hefty antibiotics after hearing you cough just once, we don’t tend to trust people, who we think don’t really understand us. Make an effort to listen to understand, instead of listening to respond. A good way to start this practice is by simply talking less . The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is an absolute classic. It’s not a step-by-step how-to book, however. The lessons will take you a while to implement since they are general principles. But that also means they’re timeless and have a powerful impact once you manage to do so.
For Book DetailOne Sentence-Summary: The Daily Stoic is a year-long compilation of short, daily meditations from ancient Stoic philosophers like Seneca, Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, and others, teaching you equanimity, resilience, and perseverance via the three Stoic disciplines of perception, action, and will. Favorite quote from the author: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the thingsI can, and the wisdom to know the diffrence.” Stoicism is a popular philosophical concept that was born in Ancient Rome and Greece. Today, thinkers and researchers still find it relevant as it delivers valuable life wisdom. The stoic philosophy is simple in nature, but humans are complex beings that often overcomplicate things. Perhaps that is why we find it so difficult to implement. The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday is a great way to start learning about this philosophy and applying it in your own life. The book has 366 short readings that will help you find happiness in your day-to-day struggles—and eventually even in the most challenging situations. Here are the three most important lessons from the book that map the core principles of stoicism: 1. Perception gives course to your thoughts, actions, and ultimately everything you do. 2. We can change the course of our life by actively managing our actions and responses. 3. Will is the internal power we as humans possess and use to nurture hope. Philosophy is a large subject, so studying it may take much more than reading a summary about Stoics. However, these three core lessons might take you one step closer to understanding what a life lived in virtue means. Lesson 1: As humans, we must learn to control our perceptions about the world if we want to live purposefully. Stoicism is a philosophy that teaches us how to control our emotions and maintain emotional balance in all things. It is the practice of being able to achieve this state of emotional balance by training the mind to be objective, calm, and rational. The three core principles of stoicism are perception, action and will. We must learn how to master perception first by understanding that we can never control anything external to ourselves. All we can do is control our thoughts, actions and reactions. By mastering these things, we can achieve a greater level of happiness and satisfaction in life. You can’t control what happens to you, but you can control how you react to it by using your perceptions to guide your actions. For example, imagine someone steals your prepacked meal from the common fridge at the workplace. You may be upset but that does not mean you have to be angry or spend all day complaining about it. Instead, you can choose how to react appropriately and objectively. Either let it go or place a formal complaint, but never worry without a purpose. Lesson 2: Work on controlling your actions, instead of letting them control you. Mastering a skill is not an easy feat, but learning about the stoic philosophy will help you become much calmer, centered, and aware of your actions. Then, you’ll be able to focus on objective perceptions, leave your biases behind, and act accordingly. Action is a core component of Stoicism after perception is formed. This is because if your perception is in control, you are the one who is acting. But if your action is in control, then it’s like you are being acted upon. You should always be the actor behind every step of your life. Still, not every perception requires an action. What really should matter is the one thing that you can actively change. A perception remains just that without action. Therefore, to master the skill of being a stoic, you must first analyze your thoughts. Note if they’re subjective and try to move objectively through the chain of thought. Then, dismiss them if you cannot find a way to change the situation. Naturally, there’s only so much you can act upon. If someone says something mean about you, you’ll first form a perception about it. You’ll be angry, indifferent, or anything in between. Now, is there anything you can do about it? No – so there’s no need to act upon that. And there you have it – the Stoic philosophy applied. Lesson 3: Will sticks with us when everything else fades. The third core concept of the Stoic philosophy is will. So far, we’ve explored how perception must be interpreted, changed, and how action is a result of it. Action is not always necessary, and it’s a powerful act that can change our life. Will is an inner power that gets us through life’s bumpy rides. It’s the act of trying more or keeping hope alive, or pushing through hardship when life feels impossible. It also helps us see past the obstacle and build new, better ways from whatever sour lemons we’ve been thrown. Will is often interpreted as an unbreakable ambition to make the impossible possible. While doing such things indeed comes from our inner force, stoics find will to be more about a sense of humility, resilience, and acceptance. Under the toughest hardships that life prepares for each and every one of us, it is will that helps us go through. Both types of will are within us, but in times of true heartbreak, pain, and hurt from within, the silent will is our friend. When life sends us obstacles and challenges to bypass and grow stronger, ambitious will can take us farther. As humans, we have to discover these powers within ourselves and learn to harness them. The Daily Stoic Review The Daily Stoic delves into the three most important concepts of stoicism by studying 366 meditations from ancient renewed thinkers . The book addresses the natural thinking process of humans by pointing out areas of improvement that we can work on through a fresher perspective, acts of change, and the power of will. While highlighting the main concepts of this philosophy, the author proves a core point of thought – we can improve our life right away, starting from the way we think. A good life is all about perception, and material things rarely bring long-lasting happiness. Continuous improvement is the key to achieving wisdom.
For Book DetailThe 48 Laws Of Power One Sentence-Summary: The 48 Laws Of Power draws on many of history’s most famous power quarrels to show you what power looks like, how you can get it, what to do to defend yourself against the power of others and, most importantly, how to use it well and keep it. Favorite quote from the author: “Powerfull people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.” Even though Mastery is a great book, it’s not the one that put Robert Greene on the map. The 48 Laws Of Power was. Published in 1998 after taking a big risk, due to quitting his former job, which he hated, the book became a bestseller and has now sold over a million copies. It’s especially popular with rappers and hip-hop artists, but many celebrities quote from the book and mention the laws’ influence on their life. 50 Cent is just one of them, with whom Greene ended up collaborating on another book. Most of the 48 laws draw on a specific situation from history, and even though some of them seem to contradict one another, there’s a precious lesson to be learned from every single one. Here are 3 lessons about power to help you understand it better: 1. Always make superiors look smarter than you. 2. Confuse competitors by acting unpredictably. 3. Don’t force others to do what you want, seduce them instead. Lesson 1: Always make superiors look smarter than you. Here’s one surefire way how to not get promoted: When your boss comes across a problem she can’t solve on her computer, go to her, and, as you fix it, say: “Seeeeee? That’s how you do it. No problem, I’m happy to help!” The one thing people in a position of power don’t want is to look powerless . But when you flaunt your skills right in front of them, that’s exactly what happens. The French minister of finance under King Louis XIV, Nicolas Fouquet, paid for that lesson with a life in prison. When he threw an excessive party at his chateau in favor of the king, the king accused him of stealing, for no one man could legally be that wealthy, and threw him into prison. So instead of showing off how good you are, make your boss look like she’s the smartest person in the room, even if you know she isn’t. Give away credit and you’ll be given responsibility in return. For example, when Galileo Galilei discovered the four moons of Jupiter, he could’ve taken all that credit. Instead, he named them after the Grand Duke, Cosimo II de’ Medici, and his brothers. As a result Cosimo appointed him as his official philosopher and mathematician, securing Galileo’s funding for his research for years to come. Lesson 2: Make errors on purpose to confuse your competition. Sometimes the competition seems to always be one step ahead of you. That’s likely because they’ve invested time and energy into researching you and finding out your behavior patterns. When that happens, your best move is to act unpredictably. Do the opposite of what you think people expect, make a mistake on purpose, or just disappear for a while. Erroneous behavior throws people off their analysis game, and while they’re busy trying to figure out your new pattern and explaining your behavior, you have the chance to strike back. This is one of the first lessons good poker players learn. If you only play hands when you’ve hit at least a pair or above, the other players will quickly be on to you and fold every time you bet. But throw in a bluff or two, which you commit to and ride out, even if you end up losing those hands, and your opponents can’t be so sure anymore. Bobby Fischer used this exact strategy to confuse Boris Spassky in their match for the 1972 world championship title in chess. He made a beginner’s mistake in their first game, didn’t even show up for the second one (and lose by forfeit, and returned only minutes before the third game started. Then he started making crazy demands, like moving cameras, switching rooms and exchanging chairs. Finally, he played openings completely atypical to his usual chess style, and eventually beat Spassky to become world champion. Lesson 3: Seduce others into voluntarily doing what you want them to, instead of forcing them. Even when you’re in a position of power already, people won’t always do what you want them to. When that’s the case, you should never resort to trying to force people to obey. Instead, make it impossible for them not to do what you’d like them to by seducing them. Chuko Liang, head military strategist of ancient China used this to break his enemy, King Menghuo. Rather than destroying their entire army, when they attacked China, he captured them all, and then …served King Menghuo great wine and food. His soldiers saw this generosity, and after Liang was sure he had baffled them, he released them but kept King Menghuo hostage. Only after threatening that he’d have to bow to the Chinese king if he was captured again, did he release the enemy. Over the years, Liang did capture Menghuo time and time again, each time making the same threat, yet always releasing his prisoner. After the seventh time, Menghuo surrendered, bowed to the king and gave up on his own accord. Raw force only breeds resentment, so use seduction instead.
For Book DetailThe Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck One Sentence-Summary: The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck does away with the positive psychology craze to instead give you a Stoic life that might not always be happy, but meaningful and centered only around what’s important to you. Favorite quote from the author: “Who you are is defined by what you’re willing to struggle for.” The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck , Mark Manson’s first “proper” book, this instant New York Times bestseller is a no BS self-help book for people who usually hate self-help. Mark Manson gets that life has become overwhelming and the only way to find our center around the things that really matter to us is to not give a f*ck about anything else. Here are 3 favorite lessons: 1. Values you can’t control are bad values to follow. 2. Don’t believe you know anything with certainty, for it keeps you from improving. 3. Trying to leave a legacy might ruin your life. The trick of not giving a fuck about most things is that you’ll be able to give one about what really matters to you. The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck Summary Lesson 1: Only hold values you control. Mark is a very Stoic guy and it shines through his writing and advice. A common idea in Stoicism is to focus only on the things you can control . This is easy enough to understand and implement when it comes to your actions, but it can be applied to more intangible aspects of your life as well. Take your values, for example. I know it’s hard to put them into words, but if you try to describe yourself in, say, three adjectives, you already have a good idea of which values most dictate your life. Let’s say you chose the words honest, punctual and popular. Here’s where Mark makes an interesting remark: Only choose to have values you can control. Most of us give up some of our ideals as we grow up, try to have a career and make money. While that’s just part of real life, it’s important you don’t hand off the steering wheel altogether. Values you don’t control are bad, because they’ll be a constant source of unnecessary suffering in your life. When we look at the three we just mentioned, honesty is 100% in your control. Only you know how honest you are, but no one else needs to. Punctuality is partially in your control. If you always leave with plenty of buffer time, you can compensate for most potential obstacles. Popularity, however, is totally out of your grasp. Sure, you can be nice and friendly to everyone, but you can’t control other peoples’ opinions. Some will always hate you, no matter what you do . Therefore, popularity isn’t the best value to focus on and you could try replacing it with one more controllable, such as kindness. Lesson 2: Certainty hampers growth. What a great principle distilled into just three words: certainty hampers growth. Imagine you could choose between two modes of moving through the world: one in which you think everything you know is 100% true and one in which you think nothing you know is 100% true. Both are stressful, but which one do you think would help you make better decisions? The latter, of course. While there’s some middle ground to be found here, rejecting the idea that you know anything for sure is a great base to start learning from. This is true for discovering factual knowledge , such as using the scientific method to build business hypotheses helps arrive at better conclusions, but it is also true for gaining conceptual knowledge . The second kind is more implicit knowledge about the relationships between various entities. Let’s take your place in the social hierarchy at school, for example. If you’re convinced you’re ugly, you’ll be sad a lot. But if you notice that you get lots of compliments at school, people call you charming and some have a crush on you, that’s evidence your brain is playing you with false certainty. If you allow yourself to have a little doubt, you can then disprove this limiting belief you hold about yourself. Lesson 3: Don’t obsess about leaving a legacy. Here’s an uncomfortable, but important reminder: You’re going to die one day. We all are. Whether we admit it or not, when the time comes closer, we’re all scared. That’s why many of us want to leave a legacy , myself included. However, Mark says that might ruin our short amount of precious time here on earth. The more we’re driven to build a great body of work, the more start chasing fame, working too much and focusing on the future. What if instead, we just tried to be useful in the present? We could still help a ton of people, enjoy our days and fully be here, while we’re here. Mark’s stance is clear: Find ways to bring yourself, your loved ones and the people you meet joy in the now and let the legacy part take care of itself.
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